Month: February 2026

“As a Father You Shall Be to Me.” Thoughts on Fathers and Sons as Merry Lays His Sword on Théoden’s Lap.

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The Return of the King by J.R.R Tolkien (Harper Collins 1991) pp. 758-760

Tolkien never knew his own father. He died in South Africa in 1896 soon after his wife, Mabel, had returned to England with her children on a family visit and was buried there in Bloemfontein. Mabel settled with her children in the Warwickshire village of Hall Green, now a suburb of the city of Birmingham. It was there that she converted to Roman Catholicism and eventually connected her family to the Birmingham Oratory, a church of the Oratorian community founded by John Henry Newman in the mid 19th century. Mabel developed Type 1 Diabetes, a condition at that time little understood and died in 1904 when only 34 years old. Ronald (J.R.R) Tolkien was just 12 years old and bereft of both his parents. Before she died Mabel had made arrangements with the priests at the Birmingham Oratory that they would become guardians to her sons and so it was that Father Francis Xavier Morgan, a man who possessed both kindness and wealth in equal and substantial measure, took on the responsibility for the raising of the two boys.

Readers of The Lord of the Rings have noted an absence of fathers, in a biological sense, in the story. Frodo is an orphan who is raised by his kindly (and wealthy) relative, Bilbo Baggins. Aragorn is an orphan who is raised by Elrond of Rivendell, and to a large degree by Gandalf also. Éomer and Éowyn are raised by their uncle, Théoden, after the death of their father, Éomund. Against this, of course, we must think of the importance of the relationship of Denethor to his two sons, Boromir and Faramir, and the relationship between Sam Gamgee and his father, the Gaffer, and it is worth noting that those relationships have many problems. Indeed, the best models of good fathers that we find in The Lord of the Rings seem to be those father figures, Bilbo, Gandalf and Théoden, who become guardians but not possessors of children.

There is a formal definition of that word, guardian, and Father Morgan had that formal relationship to the young Ronald Tolkien, but perhaps at its best it is a word that denotes a willingness to guard a charge against a world that might damage or even destroy a vulnerable young person before they are ready to face that world as an adult.

In a recent post on this blog I spoke about that moment in our lives when we realise that the grown ups are not going to turn up and we are going to have to face whatever challenge is facing us alone. We watched Merry face this as Aragorn wrestled with his own choices and we felt his vulnerability. Now, as Théoden and his company arrive at Helm’s Deep on their journey back towards Dunharrow and Edoras, we see Legolas and Gimli deepen their growing friendship, and we do not even know where Aragorn has gone. Once again, Merry feels like an item of unnecessary baggage as everyone else makes preparation for war. And then…

“The king was already there, and as soon as they entered he called for Merry and had a seat set for him at his side. ‘It is not as I would have it,’ said Théoden; ‘for this is little like my fair house in Edoras. And your friend is gone, who should also be here. But it may be long ere we sit, you and I, at the high table in Meduseld; there will be no time for feasting when I return thither. But come now! Eat and drink, and let us speak together while we may.”

It is a moment of the deepest tenderness as war is prepared and Merry is deeply moved. He offers his sword in service to the king just as Pippin did to Denethor and the king receives it graciously. Pippin offered his service to Denethor out of a sense of obligation, an attempt to pay the debt he felt he owed for the sacrifice of Boromir. Merry offers his service out of love for Théoden.

“As a father you shall be to me,” he says.

As I have written this piece a memory has come back to me and a name come to mind that I would like to honour in this blog. In 1980 I was a young teacher at a boys’ school in Zambia, Central Africa. I made a number of mistakes, not malicious ones, but the mistakes of inexperience and foolishness, and my students lost confidence in me and demanded my dismissal. Word of this even reached the office of the President of Zambia. Zambia was like a big village in those days and officials in that office told the school to get rid of me. Later I was to learn that the acting principal was going to carry out that instruction but was prevented from doing so by his deputy, Mr Tennyson Sikakwa. One evening as I sat miserably in my house at the school, Tennyson came to sit with me. “You will learn much more from how you deal with your failures than from your successes,” he said. It was a turning point in my life and I owe the profoundest debt of gratitude to him for standing with me at my lowest point. As a father he was to me and I wish to honour him here.

“I Must Go Down Also to Minas Tirith, But I Do Not Yet See The Road.” Aragorn Ponders His Way Ahead.

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The Return of the King by J.R.R Tolkien (Harper Collins 1991) p. 756-758

In the last post I thought about Merry’s fear of being left behind and of being treated as if he were merely a piece of excess baggage and commented that Aragorn gives little attention to Merry’s plight because he is pondering his own way ahead. Readers of The Lord of the Rings will recall the anguish that Aragorn felt following the fall of Gandalf in Moria as he wrestled with the question of whether he should go with Frodo to Mordor or to keep the promise that he had made to Boromir to go with him to Minas Tirith. Eventually the events that took place at Parth Galen made the choice for him and so he went with Legolas and Gimli on the great chase across Rohan following Merry and Pippin and then into the Forest of Fangorn where he met Gandalf once again beyond all hope.

Now as Théoden makes his way with his men from the wreck of Isengard to Edoras while Gandalf rides upon Shadowfax with Pippin directly towards Minas Tirith Aragorn wrestles once again with a choice. It would appear that the obvious choice would be to go with Théoden and the Riders of Rohan on their way to join the battle in Gondor but now he ponders a new question.

“He will hear tidings of war, and the Riders of Rohan will go down to Minas Tirith. But for myself and any that will go with me…”

And here Legolas and Gimli declare that they will go with Aragorn before he has the opportunity to conclude this line of thought. As far as they are concerned it is a simple matter of “All for one and one for all!” But then Aragorn continues.

“Well for myself… it is dark before me. I must go down also to Minas Tirith, but I do not yet see the road. An hour long prepared approaches.”

Aragorn is thinking about words that Galadriel sent to him through Gandalf and which he received in Fangorn. 

Where now are the Dúnedain, Elessar, Elessar, 
Where do thy kinsfolk wander afar?
Near is the hour when the Lost should come forth,
And the Grey Company ride from the North,
But dark is the path appointed for thee;
The Dead watch the Road that leads to the Sea.

Once again Aragorn’s decision will be made clear to him, not through his pondering but through events because suddenly a company of grey clad knights overtakes Théoden and his men and after the original anxiety that a battle will have to be fought is allayed by the discovery that these men are indeed the Dúnedain of the North, the Rangers of which Aragorn is the Captain, new words are given to him by Elrohir, the son of Elrond, confirming Galadriel’s words.

“The days are short. If thou art in haste, remember the Paths of the Dead.“

The story of those paths is told more fully later in the tale, of how the people of the mountains that lay between Rohan and Gondor were called by Isildur to fight with him and the forces of the last alliance between Elves and Men against Sauron at the end of the Second Age but how they had feared the Dark Lord and so refused to come. And the story goes that Isildur cursed them condemning them to a ghostly existence in the shadows of the mountains until the time came when his heir would call them to fulfil the oath that they had made to Isildur and then broken.

Words have come to Aragorn from the wisest of the Elven folk, each word confirming that which was spoken by the other. But still Aragorn hesitates.

“Great indeed will be my haste ere I take that road.”

One last thing will have to take place in order to make Aragorn’s decision clear to him. One last thing will move him from the long years of secrecy in which he has hidden his true identity, the reality that he is indeed the heir of Isildur and of Elendil, the King Elessar as Galadriel named him. Like Gandalf, who spent long years as the Grey Pilgrim before being renamed “the White”, and conferred by Iluvatar with an authority with which he could challenge the Dark Lord so too did Aragorn move from his grey years of secrecy and of hiding to a moment when he would claim his true identity as King and challenge his Enemy.